Monday morning thoughts

It’s been a tough weekend, and I’m happy to see it finished. Nothing happened, I was just exhausted and in bed most of the time. I don’t cope well with being stuck in bed, which is something I try to work on. It’s inevitable with the level of fatigue I experience, and it doesn’t help that I get upset.

Actually, it’s been a tough few weeks, and I think I’ve reached my limit. It started off with three of my fosters running away the very same day they got here. Since then, two of them have been caught, but the last one is just too clever. I feel bad that they got out of the catio, and I feel bad for the scared little guy who’s now all alone in unfamiliar environment.

Add to that, I had to go to the A & E in the middle of the night a couple of days after the runaways made their break for freedom. I still don’t know what is wrong, but my doctor has started to investigate. Something is wrong with my intestines though. I’ve got new meds that help with the nausea at least.

On top of this, I had decided to find my dog a new home. I finally realized I won’t ever be in good enough shape to give her what she needs. I put an ad online, and found her the perfect home. She moved to her new family on Thursday. Now, I’m really happy about her new home, but I’m heartbroken. For one, I love her and miss her. Also, I’ve had dogs for the past 30 years. It feels like a (another) big chunk of my identity was taken from me when I gave up Yuki.

It’s a sunny morning and I have kittens running around in the living room. My mum is doing my grocery shopping, and I can rest today, too. I hope I’ll feel well enough to sit on the veranda and catch a few rays of sun. I just want to get in touch with myself again. Find the parts of my identity that are still there.